Morning Humor

Each morning, I get up with the boys and drive them in to school. It’s been that way so long as they have been in school. We leave with about half an hour window, just in case. They normally get to school with 15-20 minutes to spare…it works for us, especially when I am working.

This morning, as I raised the garage door, I noticed that our new neighbors are having DISH TV installed, and the installation gentleman has just pulled up. He has chosen to park his van just off the very edge of my driveway. If I didn’t live at the end of a cul-de-sac in our condo development, and if I didn’t drive a Dodge Durango SUV, it probably would not be an issue. However, it’s an issue…but he has already begun unpacking his equipment and his materials to do the installation. Its a tight fit but, I’m talented, I can do this.

Should I move? He asks…Because I can back into that parking spot over there!
“I just need to get the boys to school, so sure you can back up.” I reply
“So, do you want me to move the van then?”
“I will need to get out of my driveway, yes.”
“Ok, so should I move my van?”
By this point, my true Maine sarcasm kicked in…”No, I guess you are all set. But hey thanks for asking. I’m sure I can get out.”

Jumped in the truck, and praying i didn’t show his bumper a little love, proceeded to squeeze out of my driveway, turn a tight three point turn, and maneuver my truck out to take the boys in. Phew, crisis avoided!

This is the best part…upon my return, he has the doors to the van thrown wide open, blocking half my driveway entrance, and since my son forgot his school ID, my plan is to run in, grab the school ID, and race back to drop it off for him so that he can have lunch today…ah the details of being the mother of a forgetful teenage son!

The gentleman pulls the doors on the van closed. When I get out of the Durango, he says to me, “Are you really from Maine?” I politely answer, “Yes, I was born and raised there…that is indeed where we moved here from.”

What I wanted to say: “No, actually, I visited Maine recently and while I was there, on a slow day, I popped in to DMV (Dept of Motor Vehicles), stood in line for about an hour, told them I’m from North Carolina but want to buy some license plates and put them on my truck!” It reminded of the “Here’s your sign” monologue by Bill Engvall of the Blue Collar Comedy Tour. It just made me laugh!!!

The gentleman did tell me, the DISH TV guy I mean, that his father is from Maine…up in the mountainous region (have you been to Maine…there’s many areas that can encompass) but by the town name I was able to decode the correct part of the state. I said, Have you been there? He replied, Yes, just once, and we got snowed in. I replied -Yes, that’s why I’m now in North Carolina. To which he replied – Welcome to the area!!!
So at the end of the morning…let me be clear! Nice guy, just trying to be friendly…but blocking my driveway, not a good thing. Yes, the plates from Maine are real. Put those two pieces together…I’m a Maine girl who drives a 4×4 Durango and knows how to use it … block my driveway at your own risk. I have excellent insurance!!!
Happy Wednesday everyone!!

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