Meeting the Author!

 I had the pleasure of attending, on personal invitation, a speaking engagement for Jean Flahive, author of Billy Boy, the story of a Berwick, ME civil war soldier. His is the story of a mentally challenged young man who enters the Civil War to avoid being left behind by his friends. He is a true character, from our town, and his grave is local as well. What an engaging woman…I had enjoyed the story so much that I found her personal website and sent an email. She responded within a day, thanking me for taking time to write to her, for sharing my perspective on the story. Her characters were so real, so familiar…last names shared among current Berwickians…roads and intersections I have traveled along many times…and young men similar to those my boys hang out with on a daily basis. Had it been a different century in the same setting, her characters could have held the names of my own boys and their friends, fighting a different war in a different time for a different cause. 

What strikes me most is how down to earth she was, pulling me in for a hug, knowing exactly who I was when I mentioned that we had corresponded via email. She thanked me for coming, so glad to meet me, introduced me to her sister, and to her current writing partner for the story that has just been released and of which I purchased a copy. She also, at the end of the event, told me to keep writing, to find where my heart and mind had time to gather together and create a master piece. Coming from a published writer, the compliment felt and still feels immense and so encouraging. 

As a blossoming writer, her manner of delivery and addressing the group of small town people was wonderful. She recanted the end of the story, sharing the sorrow and losses of that war, the success and great role in history that Maine played. She introduced new characters brought to life in her next book, Railroad to the Moon, and I have to say that I am beyond excited to read it…yeah, you know I bought a signed copy! In the second book is the voice of a man famous to the state of Maine, Orin Cheney, whose roots begin with a home that housed underground railroad members, who grew up knowing Frederick Douglass, and who served his entire life…a great accomplishment being that he is the founder of Bates College, Maine’s mini Ivy League school! I’m absolutely captivated and cannot wait to spend some time digging into this man and his contribution to Maine’s history. She even offered to come back to Berwick and take a group out to Billy’s grave which, as it turns out, is quite difficult to find according to the locals. I have my directions…I’m going on a hunt I think! And the North Berwick Historical Society wants to organize a walk out there as well…one event, so many new connections and friendly local faces, not to mention the honor of meeting Jean!

As my writing demonstrates, I am beyond excited having attended this event. I have my new book which I cannot wait to jump into. I made new friends and have a standing invitation to not only spend more time with the Historical Society but also with Jean, as well as a standing invitation to keep in touch with Jean and to keep writing (her words), even to share some of my pieces with her as my writing and pieces become more focused. My goodness…I could ramble on and on but won’t. My friends, I just wanted to share the story, share my evening, and give voice to the excitement I’m feeling after having attended this gathering. #feelingblessed

Tech Saavy…

I have found an interesting opportunity to write, and would definitely welcome putting myself up to this challenge. My concern however is that as “tech saavy” as I’m told I am, I’m just a novice when it comes to linking Tumblr/ Twitter/ FB/ etc. I want an all in one page…link it all up and call it a day. And if I want my words and thoughts and ideas and pics and posts being sent out in somewhat of a blast fashion, I need all those facets to cover a wider audience. So I’m appealing to you all for your assistance…I’m going to go home and read up on catchy copy, how to utlize various programs to create an all in One type blog/site.

HELP!!!!!

Green Light = Hope

Having just watched The Great Gatsby with fresh young faces, I am reminded of just how timeless that story is. My 16 year old son sat beside me, reciting his favorite lines, filling in the blanks where the director’s cut lines short. For example, when Nick sees Gatsby reaching toward s the green light at the end of Daisy’s dock, Nick says “He seemed to be reach out for something” which in the book is followed by “minute and far away.” (i.e. visible but just out of reach – my son’s clarification for me!) Hope – always just there, the next goal or dream a flicker but just out of reach, even if just in that moment. I had the strongest sense of connection; my mind began reeling, realizing how true that rings to me, especially right now.
Each of us in our way always sees the shining green light in the distance, and as goals are attained, a new goal/dream/green light shines brightly in the distance. There are days and times when the light seems or feels less pronounced, when a fog or mist or storm rolls in, seemingly blocking it out. Sometimes we get turned around, our internal compass accidentally pointing us in the wrong direction, completely blinding an ability to see or locate that green light. And then, when the storm lifts and the compass is righted, the green light is there once again. It is in those moments when all seems right in the world. Maybe this point of perspective is old news, maybe this is an “Ah ha” moment for me…but the message was so clear that it caught me off guard. (Don’t you love when that happens?) Maybe it’s that for the first time in a long time I can see that green light so perfectly in my own life that the symbolism of it really hit home. I used to call these my “midnight epiphanies” but since it was around 9pm, I can’t this time.
At one point in my life, my hopes and dreams were solely focused inward. Now, my green light shines solely on my boys and the future I can only hope they create for themselves. Today for example, my light was temporarily blocked…my oldest son is really floundering right now. He is 19, the awkward age where you are not technically a “grown up” but you are no longer regarded as a member of the “teenage” group either. For kids who are like me, school was easy, and the transition went smoothly from high school to college to life. For kids like my son who struggled with school, the transition is more difficult. Knowing my son needs some extra help with this, I talked to my supervisor about cutting back my hours at work, temporarily…the goal being to explore options. He needs an advocate to take those entry level steps with him and then, he will be fine…I thought, “I will be that advocate!” (green light thinking) My supervisor recommended FMLA and let me know I would need a note from a doctor about my son’s “condition” and “need for an advocate” to not jeopardize my job. (red light) I explained my scenario again to which she admitted she had misunderstood my request and our initial conversation; saying she understood my goal (green light) but that my weekly hours must be worked to avoid jeopardizing my job. GGRRR! I’m not deterred though and will do whatever I must to ensure my son’s future. While it isn’t my responsibility alone, I know that my hopes and dreams for him probably exceed his own, and he will need to be more engaged to make that happen. For me, the green light is shining brightly, and I won’t be deterred. Onward and upward, moving my son forward. What happened today was a light mist that could have dimmed that green light but instead fueled that intensity for me.
It’s about hope and change, red light green light, mist/storms and sunshine, an internal compass and always reaching for those goals and aspirations. The image during Gatsby was so breathtaking…I had forgotten the beautiful images, real and metaphorical, the lines that resonate, the memories that a simple movie image or line generates. Clearly for me, it was the hope and the horizon, the gap (lake) between what is and what could be, what might’ve been. But it was the promise of the green light, the knowledge of what is to come, and watching my sons reaching out towards that own green lights that really resonated with me. I felt a moment of hope, a moment of promise, a moment of empowerment for my sons and what lay next for them. The green light, just a timeless image…troubling, moving, stirring, and on occasion a little scary, but always there, just there, shining minute and faraway.

Moving up…

The more time I spend out here on WordPress, the more I find writers that I admire. Whether it’s a set of photographs, a well worded blog piece, choice of quotes, the latest review of a book being read, or just a voice that is so familiar it’s like hearing myself, I cannot tell you all how wonderful it is to have found you all. I know, we travel around the internet and blogsphere, randomly bumping into someone with whom we connect, and if we are lucky, get that connection back. I’m blessed to have found a few of those connections already, and am so glad that it was my writing and my voice that provided that pathway.

I read what everyone is writing, bounce around saying yes to some and not so much to others, but there is a standing respect I have for everyone out here, putting their ideas and hearts and passion and interest out on the line. Coming up we’ve endured rejections, red pens bleeding on our essays, a B for what felt like A work; then we enter the workplace, and our efforts that make the team flow are given a nod but not always the gold star we might hope for; and for me, my circle of “local” friends isn’t into writing and the arts as much as I have always been though they are amazing women and men who make my “local” world a joy to exist in. But here, in the WordPress world, you all are just amazing, so I’m taking a moment to recognize the dedication, willingness, bravery, courage, and love of writing you all possess and put out there on your blogs.

Awww, I’m not much of a sap (I’m lying as I cry during sad movies) but I know that finding one’s voice and a comfort level with it is a struggle for even the most seasoned writers. The small network of co-writers and co-dreamers I have found out here has encouraged a voice I felt would take much longer to rediscover. I post long and short passages, emotions, ideas, and random Mom thoughts…and no one says “Um, here’s what you could’ve done better” although constructive criticism is welcome (so long as you don’t tear me to shreds.) It’s daunting, writing…rewriting…editing…hoping the words connect with your audience, hoping a new audience member says hello…

But this is my Thank You, to each and every one of you…for who you are, for how you write, and for the sunshine & encouragement your words bring to my days!